


The X-ones

by Storiesfromthebluebox



Category: Supernatural, The X-Files, The Young Ones, X-Files - Fandom
Genre: Crossover, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-27
Updated: 2014-12-27
Packaged: 2018-03-03 21:57:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2889350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storiesfromthebluebox/pseuds/Storiesfromthebluebox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the worlds of The Young Ones, X-files and Supernatural collide.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The X-ones

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Secret Santa Christmas present for the lovely Victoria. She loves The X-files, and it's thanks to her that I started to watching it. The idea was to do a Young Ones/X-files crossover, however I couldn't help but sneak Dean Winchester in there. What's a story about alternate dimensions and empty malls without the Winchesters?
> 
> This thing is a mess but it's a Christmas present so don't judge me on this one.

_The crazy is out there._

Vyvyan hated playing hide and seek. Especially when it was initiated by that bastard Rick. They’d tried to have a failed Christmas dinner that mostly consisted out of lentils and leftovers from the trashcan. Neil had tried to bake a cake, but it had set fire. Not completely accidentally, of course.

“Well, this has been a bit of a disaster isn’t it?”, Rick had said, when they were all staring at the wrecked table. 

“I know. Even Christmas with my parents was more bearable”, Mike agreed.

“Well I just think Christmas is stupid anyway”, Vyvyan said. “I mean, what’s the point? Worship some bloke that was born in a crib? I was born in the gutter on the streets! Do you see anyone going around having bloody ceremonies about me?”

“You know Vyv, in some families, that would be considered blasphemy”, Mike said. 

“Oh _dear_ me”, Rick said. “And what exactly is God going to do about it? Send a lightning strike down to our dinner table?” He snorted.

Right at that moment, God fired a lightning strike down to their dinner table and burned all the remaining food to coal.

“I’m usually a nice guy, you know”, said God, who looked an awful lot like all the members of the Balowski family. “But those four idiots can piss me off sometimes”. 

“Blimey”, Rick coughed. “Your farts are getting smellier every day don’t they Neil?”

“Well, I agree with Vyvyan”, Neil said despondently. “I think Christmas is just completely depressing”. 

“Oh, I know!” Rick called out excitedly. “Why don’t we play a nice little game of hide and seek?”

Vyvyan rolled his eyes. “I don’t think there’s a more infantile and BORING way to spend Christmas”.

“This might be good, Vyv. At least that way we don’t have to see each other for a while”.

And so it was decided. Rick counted to ten while everyone ran into different directions. Well, he and Neil did anyway. Mike just took in his usual spot in the kitchen closet. Neil went up the stairs. Running out of time, Vyvyan decided to go for the closet in the hallway. That might be fun. Last time he ended up in some stupid snow land. Hopefully this time he would end up in a cooler place…

\-----

Dana Scully was sitting in her lab, warming her hands on a cup of coffee. She had been doing some tests for a case they were working on, and was taking a break. Just when she was enjoying the peace and quiet, (she didn’t get too many of it) Mulder came into the office. She knew that walk: determined, dynamic, his face this strange mixture of excitement and brooding. He was onto something. And she was right: he had a file in his hand

“What is it?” she asked.

Mulder showed her the file. “1979, a twenty-one year old disappeared in an empty mall. No track of him anywhere, no body, nothing. Eyewitnesses saw him go in, and he never came out again. Maybe you remember him: Michael Savage”.

“Many kids have disappeared over the years, Mulder. I don’t have time to keep track of all of them”. 

“It happened again. This afternoon, an adult male has vanished into thin air in the exact same spot”.

“How is this an X-file?”

“This time is different”.

“It is?” she said, trying her best skeptical look. “How?” 

“There’s a witness who saw the man disappear. Said he got sucked away and vaporized…”

Scully raised her eyebrows. “Vaporized”, she said.

“That’s not all”, Mulder continued. “The witness claims to have seen someone else appearing. A boy of approximately twenty years old. Just appeared. Like they were switched. Teleported, maybe”.

“Teleported?” She still was having some difficulty with believing all of this.

“The boy was held at the police station this morning, he has no identification whatsoever”.

“Is he still there?”

“No. They let him go, decided he was just some tramp”. 

“What are you trying to say here, Mulder?”

“I want to talk to him”, he reached for his jacket. “Who knows where he comes from, Scully. This might be a key to get in contact with…”.

She gave him a look. He didn’t need to finish his sentence.

“Come on, don’t tell me you’re not at least a little bit curious”, he said with a little smile before leading the way out of their office.

She sighed, and already knew she was going to follow him before she moved her feet.

“Mulder, where are we going?”, she said when he took a turn to a small side road.

“We’re going to meet an old friend of mine. He told me to meet us there”.

“Why there?”

Mulder looked at her. “Let’s just say he… prefers alternative methods to solve cases than the police”. 

“Alternative methods”, she repeated, knowing where this was going. “Is this one of your looney, spooky spiritual friends?”

“In fact, he’s quite the contrary”, Mulder said, taking another turn. Scully stared out of the window. _Whatever that means._ The suburban neighbourhood they were driving in now had deteriorated houses and dirty streets. They approached the mall, where a black Impala was parked.

“That’s him”, Mulder said, giving more gas.

As they got out of the car, they could hear a conversation going on in the other car.

“WHY WON’T YOU LET ME GO, YOU BASTARD”, a shrill, ugly voice yelled.

“You’re not going anywhere until you tell me what happened to my brother”, a deep, angry voice answered.

“I told you, I don’t KNOW!”

“Yeah? Well, sit tight, buddy. Because ‘not knowing’ isn’t saving your ass”.

“But I’m BORED. I’ve been sitting here for half a bloody hour already!”

Approaching the car, Scully could distinguish the two people talking. One was a little punk boy with a hideously outdated red Mohawk, and the other one was an older guy with short, dirty blonde hair.

“That’s the boy they found?” Scully asked. Mulder nodded.

She knocked on the car window. “Excuse me, FBI”.

The man with the dirty-blonde hair opened the car. “Good afternoon, agent Scully”, he said. 

“And who are you?”

“Scully, this is Dean Winchester”, Mulder introduced him. “He’s a… specialist of some kind”.

Dean Winchester raised his eyebrows. “Huh. I guess you could say that”.

“How did you know my name?” she asked, eyeing the man suspiciously.

“Come on, agent Dana and Scully and Fox Mulder. _The X-files._ Dude, you guys are full-on legends”.

She exchanged a quick look with Mulder. Are we?  


“My geeky brother would probably fanboy big-time if he were here”.

“Speaking of your brother: where is he?” Mulder asked. 

“He’s in whatever hell-hole this little monster came from”, he said, pointing to the punk on the backseat, who was playing with a knife. 

“Hey, don’t touch that!” Dean yelled, grabbing the knife from his hands. “You want this to be smooth, you don’t touch anything, you listen. Understood?”

“NO!” screamed the punk.

“Hey, I don’t think there’s a need to get violent here”, Scully interrupted.

The boy grinned at Dean. “Now YOU listen, sissy”.

Dean obviously had to suppress the need to punch the boy, but turned away. He’s hopeless, he mouthed silently to Scully and Mulder.

“Do you mind if we ask you some questions, sir?” Scully asked.

He stared at her again. “You know, you can call me Dean. I don’t think there’s a need to get formal…”.

Ignoring this, Scully asked: “You claim your brother has disappeared in this mall this morning?”

“That’s right”.

“And what exactly were you doing in a mall that has been empty for years?”

“That’s what I do. I’m sure agent Mulder has told you. Walking around in empty malls kind of comes with the job”.

“Does your job include drugs?”

He seemed offended about that. “Drugs? No. Me and my brother, we’re… hunters”.

“Hunters? Were you hunting animals in a mall?”

She noticed Dean giving Mulder a look. Doesn’t this woman know anything?

“They’re paranormal investigators”, Mulder explained. 

She had to suppress a sigh. She should have known. Despite Mulder’s unusual beliefs and methods, most of the time he was an excellent agent. He had good hunches. She had hoped this to be one of them, but so far, this had seemed a waste of time. What was she doing here, standing in some deserted back alley talking to a ghost-fanatic and a weird punk? 

“So, if I understand correctly”, the punk spoke from the backseat. He wasn’t yelling now, but his voice was still squeaky. “You hunt for ghosts and monsters and all that?”

“Exactly”.

“Cool!” A large grin spread on his face. “Maybe this universe isn’t so boring after all!”  


“Yeah, well, you’re staying in the car until I know what happened to my brother”, Dean snapped at him.

The boy angrily folded his arms together, like a little child. 

“Do you mind if we ask… “ Mulder gestured to the boy.

“Hey, smart guy, you got a name?” Dean asked.

“Vyvyan”, the boy answered, still sulky. 

“Vyvyan, do you have any idea what could have happened to Dean’s brother?” Mulder asked.

“No”.

“What happened in that mall?”

“Look, all I know is, I was playing hide and seek, and all of a sudden I’m forced in a car by this bogey-bum”. He obviously meant Dean. 

“You were playing hide and seek in the mall?” Mulder asked.

“No. I was playing hide and seek at my house”.

Mulder blinked.

“Look, it’s obvious. I’m from a _different universe_ ”, Vyvyan said, rolling his eyes, annoyed by their slow understanding of the situation.

“He keeps saying that”, Dean said.

“Why don’t we go inside of the mall, see what we can find there?” Scully said, wanting to get it over with as fast as possible. “If your brother was kidnapped, maybe the kidnappers are still inside”.

“Are we going to fight ghosts and monsters now?”

“No, because you’re staying here,” Dean said.

“Actually, it might be handy if he’d come with us”, Mulder said. “After all, if there is something in there connected to another dimension, maybe we can send him back”.

Dean seemed annoyed at that, because he knew he was right. 

“All right, but you’re staying with me”, he grumbled, grabbing Vyvyan’s jacket’s lapel from behind and yanking him out of the car. He drew his gun and pointed it at his back. 

“HEY!” the boy screamed. “Drop the gun you bastard!”

“Get on with it you clown”, Dean said, giving the boy a push. 

And so the strange company went inside: Dean leading Vyvyan with a gun in his back, Mulder and Scully at the sides. Scully drew her weapon: she had no idea what to expect inside. Mulder did the same. They gave each other a little nod. Whatever they were up against, they were in it together.

“Bring us to the place where your brother disappeared”, Mulder said to Dean.

“All right, follow me”, Dean said. “Walk”, he commanded Vyvyan, lifting the gun a little higher. The boy obeyed reluctantly.  
They went up an old squeaky stairs, some sunbeams shining through the window, revealing the dirt on the steps. Scully wondered how old this place was. They walked quietly, alert for any sound.  
After going through a long hallway, they arrived in what looked like an old book store. It was full of books and bookshelves that were more dust than anything else. She duck up her little flashlight from the pocket of her coat, and saw a couple of mice dissipate in the blink of an eye. 

“There”, Dean pointed. There was a bookcase in the back.

“The bookcase?” Mulder asked.

“That’s where my brother disappeared. He went right through the wall”. 

Scully looked at the bookcase, and for the first time, she felt frightened. She didn’t believe in the paranormal, but in places like this, in the dark, between the dust, the possibility always seemed more plausible.

Suddenly, it seemed like the wall turned into liquid. Slowly but surely, a human shape came out of it. Both Mulder and Scully lifted their guns. The figure came closer and…

“Hello”, a droopy voice said. “Uhm, I don’t mean to hassle your dimension or anything…”

“Who are you!?” Dean asked aggressively.

“Uhm, hello, my name’s Neil, I’ve been sent to get Vyvyan in exchange for your brother…”. He swept his long, straight hair out of his face.

“Really? First this freakshow right here”, he nudged towards Vyvyan, “and now a freaking hippie? What kind of dimension is this?”

“Get his brother, Neil”, Vyvyan said. “It’s the only way they’ll let me go”.

“Uhm, okay. Just a second”. He reached into the liquid part of the wall, and dragged out another person. Scully felt dizzy. She couldn’t be seeing this. 

“Sammy, are you okay?” Dean asked tensely.

The rather tall young man, Sam, said: “Yeah, Dean, I’m fine. But…” he laughed. “You should have seen this place, man. The furniture could _talk”._

Scully exchanged looks with Mulder. For once, he was just as puzzled as she was.

“Let the boy go, Dean”, Mulder said.

Slowly, Dean lowered his gun. 

“Byee”, the hippie said and he waved, before getting sucked up in the wall. Vyvyan held up two fingers and followed him. After that, the wall turned into solid rock again. Scully walked forward and put her hand on the wall. It was solid. Just a wall.

“I don’t believe it”, she mumbled. “How… how is this possible?” She looked at Mulder, who was standing so close behind her.

“Come on, Scully”, Mulder said gently, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Let’s go back”. She looked at him. No, she didn’t look at him. She looked into him. She searched for something in those green eyes. Reassurance, maybe. Reassurance that she wasn't crazy, that he was here with her and that his eyes had seen the same as hers.  
Before she even realized what was happening, her nose was buried in his chest. She breathed the smell of his unwashed shirt and his sweaty skin.

“It’s all right”, Mulder murmured into her hair. “It’s all right, Scully”.

The ride back was silent.

“Can you just drop me off home?” Scully asked. "I've seen too many weird things today".

“There’s something I need to show you at our office”. Dana didn’t even have the energy to protest. 

“What is it you needed to show me?” she asked, when they were about to enter the office. But then she saw. She had to blink a few times. Their usually shady, grey office was now a beacon of light: Christmas lights all over their table, the desk, the computer, the door... Mulder had even had the sense of humour to top it off with a few little, flickering toy UFO’s. On the desk was a bottle of wine and two glasses.

“Merry Christmas, Scully”. 

She couldn't hold back the smile. "Mulder, I can't believe you did this".

Mulder smiled. "Shall we?" He started pouring the glasses and handed her one.

"To the X-files", Scully smiled, raising her glass. 

"To the X-files".

\----------------

“They never did find out who that boy was who disappeared”, Rick said, after Vyvyan had told the others the story.

“Come on, guys,” Mike said. "You mean you didn't know?"

They all looked at him questioningly. “Eh?” Vyvyan asked.

“I'm Michael Savage!” Mike said. "I came here a few years ago."

"I've always thought you were a little bit weird”, Rick said.

“Why would you come to thus utterly BORING dimension?” Vyvyan asked.

“I was bored”, Mike simply said.

They all nodded understandingly. Being bored was something they were familiar with.


End file.
